education spa 

The Perfect Retreat

This is another installment in my Wednesday for Women blog series, where I feature information to help women gain greater influence, power, and confidence in their professional and personal life. If you’re a man reading this, please enjoy it and then forward these weekly Wednesday blogs to the powerful women in your life. They’ll thank you for it! I’m a big proponent of vacations. Like you, I work long hours and am deeply committed to the success of my business, so managing personal time is a top priority. Taking time off from the rigors of work, technology, and the daily grind is critical for keeping creativity and motivation high. And I’ve discovered that it’s often during breaks and vacation times that I solve nagging issues and come up with some of my best business ideas. So rather than completely “checking out” during a vacation, I’ve become more conscious about using the time to “dial in” and gain a renewed sense of purpose and professionalism.

When I’m feeling overloaded and not working efficiently, I take short breaks. These “mini vacations” provide the space for my intuition to break through the noise and provide counsel. When I take weekend and longer vacations I use that time to plan and problem solve as well. So whether you’re taking a short break or a long vacation, here are a few tips that can help you use your time off in a way that not only calms your mind and body but also energizes your drive and motivation.

  • Keep a journal handy. I have small notebooks in every possible location: in my car, in every handbag, by my bed, and in my pocket. I take them with me on hikes, weekend getaways, long vacations, or even when  shopping or going out to dinner with friends. Great ideas often come when you’re the most relaxed…and they can disappear just as easily. So be prepared to jot them down for a later time.
  • Spend time with like-minded people. Every now and then it’s important to plan your time off so you’re spending it with people who can support you in your personal and professional growth. Sometimes that means taking time for you and leaving the family at home. A weekend with the “girls” can do wonders for your outlook and self-esteem.
  • Empty your mind…and then refuel it. Thinking about nothing on your time off is extremely helpful to reset your body and mind, and it helps you feel good in the moment. But the things you’re leaving behind (including those irritating challenges) will still be at work waiting for you. So rather than simply empty your mind, find a new activity that can help you refuel your brain. This could mean reading that business strategy book you’ve been putting off, learning about a topic that is outside of your area of expertise, or even focusing on improving a skill. Exercise your brain in new ways so you can gain a broader perspective to work and life.
  • Create a plan. The last day of vacation, of a long weekend, or even of a “mini vacation” is sad for many people. So why not find a way to keep that refreshed focus and feeling of calm you experience while on vacation with you all the time? You have choices on how you live your life every day. You can choose to let the stress engulf you, or you can choose to take control of the stressors in your life. Use your journal and jot down two or three concrete ideas that you can take back with you.

There’s no reason why getting some R&R can’t also include helping you be more and do more. For more ideas on how the two concepts can be combined, check out my new program, Speaking Spas. And before you plan that next vacation or long weekend—or even that short break—take a few minutes to think about what you really need. When you take care of yourself first, you’ll have much more of yourself to share with others.

Aspiring Women

Every Wednesday I’ll be posting a blog geared especially for women. This new blog will feature information to help women gain greater influence, power, and confidence in their professional and personal life. If you’re a man reading this, please enjoy it and then forward these weekly Wednesday blogs to the powerful women in your life. They’ll thank you for it! No one ever said work was easy, but for women, the workplace can be an increasingly difficult place. First, the old cliché of the “glass ceiling” is still alive and well in many industries. Second, the fact is that women still earn less than men—77 cents to every man’s dollar, to be exact. Yes, women have to overcome a lot to be successful. Therefore, having the advanced skills to break through that ceiling and help shrink the pay gap is critical.

Despite these truths about the workplace, there is a core group of women who aspire to reach new heights and who will stop at nothing to get there. These are the women in leadership roles in every industry who organize, educate, inspire, influence, create vision and drive results. These are the women who are determined to overcome any challenge. These are the women who set the bar to new levels, encouraging everyone—both males and females—to stretch their capabilities and master new skills.

And these women are passionate about personal growth and professional development. Aspiring women want to strengthen their skills, be challenged to grow and learn, and connect with other like-minded women. What can help them gain greater influence, power, and confidence at work? For many women, it comes down to their communication skills—their communication style, how they listen, how they facilitate a meeting, how they present information, and how they give direction to others. These are the crucial elements that truly matter when you’re trying to set yourself apart from the crowd and develop greater credibility and influence.

As you continually strive for new levels of professional success and personal satisfaction, here are a few tips to keep in mind:

  • Polish your physical presence. Focus on refining your communication delivery skills, including your body language (what people see when they look at you—your eye contact, facial expressions, posture, gestures, and movement), your vocal skills (the creation and delivery of your vocal sounds—your volume, enunciation, inflection, rate of speech, pitch, inflection, and strategic pauses), and your word choices (the precise message you give—crafting concise sentences, selecting language that is audience focused, and liberally using words that convey power and emotion). For assistance with all of these skills, be sure to read my past blogs and web site articles.
  • Build your support network. Reach out to other aspiring women as often as possible. Integrate these women into your life as role models, support people, and taskmasters. Remember that you need people to learn from, to cheer you on, and to set the bar and hold you accountable. By having all three types of people in your life, you can achieve your goals.
  • Take more risks. Once you have developed your skills and built your support network, then you have to get out there and use your new skills and knowledge to build your platform. Nothing great in life ever occurs without some risk. So stretch yourself out of your comfort zone and go for it.  

To help women achieve more, I’ve developed a new program called Speaking Spas. Designed for women who desire growth and challenge—and who also require nurturing and support to achieve their goals—Speaking Spas is a retreat for women who want to become more powerful communicators. This program takes place in a tranquil spa setting, so interspersed with the rigorous DeFinis training curriculum are nourishing opportunities for spa treatments, exercise, privacy, and healthy food. I believe that professional development can be done in a whole new way—a way geared just for women.

If you want to be more and do more in your career, you can. Don’t let anything hold you back. With powerful skills and motivation, you can reach the sky that exists beyond the glass ceiling—and that’s when your opportunities are truly limitless.